juice master monkey

The last few weeks have seen a flurry of new purchases made by my Dad. This is shocking considering he feels that Costco rips him off when he buys socks in bulk ("12 pairs for $1.99?!! I could make a pair with one eye and no hands!"). His most recent obsession? Juicing. And when I say obsession I mean obsession. He stays up late at night in the kitchen with an apron on, faint sounds of niaaooor niaaooorrrrrr coming through the closed door. It sounds like we're using chainsaws on body parts. Yum. Juicy.

His first purchase was the Jack La Lanne Power Juicer. But he soon realized that wasn't enough. Pulp kept on getting stuck. It didn't grind seeds or skin. So he called customer service and they recommended the European model, with a stronger engine that could handle seeds, rinds, skin and the like. The day it came, my Dad stayed up until 1:30 AM juicing. We drank apple-pear-carrot juice for 9 days. But it still wasn't enough to quench his insatiable thirst for juicing (nice play on words, eh?). So he returned the European model and now, NOW, has finally purchased the mother of all juicers: a commercial grade power juicer. It's 500 watts and comes in stainless steel. It's being delivered sometime next week. If anyone wants 2 litres of cucumber juice, please let me know.


Mr. Mah's Top 5 Infomercial Purchases:

5. George Foreman's Lean Mean Grilling Machine - "Knock out the fat"

4. Ab Sculptor - "Just 3 minutes a day"

3. Pasta Pronta Express - "Step up to the pasta"

2. Jack Lalaine Power Juicer - "Unlock the power of juicing"

1. Ronco Showtime Rotisserie - "Set it and forget it"